Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
Category Archives: Le Photoshoppe
August 6, 2001
Today marks the sixth anniversary of the day President Bush received a PDB (President’s Daily Brief) entitled, “Bin Laden Determined to Strike in US.” Yup, 8/6/01, a full month before the 9/11 attacks. Fat lot of good it did the victims of 9/11.
Ripley of Zen Cabin is hosting a blogswarm to commemorate this day in American (and Presidential) history. The theme? Here, see for yourself:
I’ve written this before, but it bears repeating. As a Jewish kid growing up in the 60s and 70s, I was raised on Geprge Santayana’s wisdom, that those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it. We were force-fed the horrors of the past, such knowledge being proof against another demagogue rising to power to murder us yet again.
I’m beginning to wonder if Santayana was right. Maybe human nature is too deeply flawed to be protected by something as abstract as history. Maybe too few Americans ever considered the possibility that it could happen here.
Mind you, I’m not suggesting George W. Bush intentionally allowed the events of 9/11 to take place so that he could control our populace with fear, meanwhile making an historically unprecedented grab for Executive Branch authority, as well as a truly awe-inspiring theft of the public coffers. This Administration’s kakistocracy‘s subsequent actions come close to proving an altogether different hypothesis — that incompetence allowed 9/11 to transpire. Incompetence, craven indifference, or calculated maneuver, take your pick.
I’ll tell you one thing, though. “Calculated maneuver” makes for the best punchline . . .
Blogswarm tomorrow, 8/6/07: the 8/6/01 PDB
On 8/6/01, George W. Bush received a PDB — President’s Daily Brief — entitled, “Bin Laden Determined to Strike in U.S.” What he did with that information, we may never know, but thanks to the demands of the 9/11 Commission, we have a portion of the memo itself. Wikipedia (that previous link) has arguments pro and con regarding the significance of the memo as it relates to Bush Administration culpability, but it is important to realize that parts of the memo have been redacted. (Why? Oh, national security considerations, no doubt!)
Tomorrow, Ripley of Zen Cabin is hosting a blogswarm to commemorate 8/6/07. Anyone is welcome to join. Ripley has a couple of images up at his joint, and as you know, it doesn’t take much of an invitation for me to indulge in a bit of photoshopping:
See y’all at tomorrow’s blogswarm! And check out tonight’s heads-up from Blue Gal.
Monday Night Pimpfest, Part Two!
Smartest PR gal ever emailed me this afternoon. She must know that bloggers pay little attention to mass emails, even if they do come from someplace as beloved as Comedy Central. So she didn’t just drop some ad-spam on me. Oh, no. She read my blog first:
Hi Douglas-
While your readers are busy blinding themselves after clicking through your “Potter Spoilers” post, I thought you would be interested to know that Comedy Central’s Indecision 2008 campaign (http://www.indecision2008.com/) is officially underway, keeping tabs on all things political so that you can either laugh or cry your way through the upcoming elections.
The site is updated daily, with embeddable clips from the Colbert Report, Daily Show, and Lil’ Bush. There are also customizable widgets and polls, which are also fully embeddable, so you can keep your readers in the loop on Today’s Conservative Talking Point (“Lure Mexicans across border with candy on a string”) and what happens if they Google “Hillary Clinton + Sexyâ€.
You and your readers also have the chance to visit the “Candidate Casting Couch” to weigh in on which candidate fulfills the role of the best Harry Potter characters (preview: Rudy Giuliani = Draco Malfoy, and it actually makes sense…)
So, um YEAH I’m gonna give y’all a shout if you read my stuff! Plus, that “Candidate Casting Couch” really is pretty cute. (“Al Gore = Hermione Granger. Lovable know-it-all; has grown noticeably ‘shapelier’ over the years.”) They want to know who = Harry Potter. But isn’t it obvious?
Answer below the fold.
The Cap’n Has Landed
The Cap’n ‘n her lovely spouse are headin’ for Washington, D.C. this week to testify before Congress. Per the Cap’n:
Hearing on “Strengthening the Middle Class: Ensuring Equal Pay for Women,†scheduled at 9:30 a.m. in room 2175 Rayburn House Office Building. Witnesses to be announced.
* Cap’n Dyke’s lovely spouse will be th’main speaker for th’WalMart Gender Discrimination Class Action Lawsuit at this hearin’. Blue Gal gives me great press, but Th’ Cap’n will only appear if for some reason Dee can’t appear. Here’s her declaration at Walmart Class, th’lawsuit’s website.
And if you would like to learn more about the class action lawsuit, here’s the website, and here’s their intro:
– Attention –
present and former female employees of Wal-Mart or Sam’s Club:
- Have you been denied career opportunities in management?
- Have you been denied equal pay for equal work?
- Have you been getting the run-around about promotions or raises?
- Have you hit the glass ceiling?
If you worked for Wal-Mart at any time since December 26, 1998, you may have legal claims in a class action sex discrimination lawsuit against Wal-Mart. Learn more!
Wal-Mart, be warned: The Mound of Blue Dykes has ye in her sights.
Ye may begin shakin’ with fear.
Hat tip to Blue Gal, who will surely have more details. And be sure to stop by the Cap’n’s place to give her some love.
D.
Naked Couch Day, Sans Couch
D: But but but Dean’s doing it! In two places, even. And Kris is doing it, too!
K: NO. I will NOT let you humiliate us in public AGAIN.
D: Those leopard skin briefs could have belonged to anyone.
K: Anyone with the fur of a Tasmanian devil.
D: Exactly. And that chair photo left a great deal to the imagination.
K: Really? You thought so? I thought it left very little to the imagination. Just a teensy inconsequential mote —
D: You won’t even have to take off your clothes.
K: What?
D: There was nothing in Dean’s challenge that said both parties had to be naked.
K: So I’m not going to regret this later.
D: Not at all.
K: But you might regret this later.
D: I would if I had any shame.
Yes, that’s precisely what led up to this particular photo shoot . . . yielding an image that captured the zeitgeist of a generation, a cover widely regarded as Rolling Stone Magazine’s greatest ever.
Exclusive: Bill O’Reilly’s Pre-Appearance Agreement for The Colbert Report
If you saw Papa Bear sparring with Stephen Colbert last night (Crooks and Liars has the video), you know something went horribly, terribly wrong. How could the legendary Bill O’Reilly have allowed this young upstart to humiliate him so badly?
Balls and Walnuts has the answer: Jesse Watters, producer of The O’Reilly Factor, bungled the pre-appearance agreement. This evening, we have received not merely a copy of that agreement, but a copy marked up by O’Reilly after the fact.
But a picture is worth . . . well, you know.
It’s still not too late
. . . to get your own World of Warcraft epic gear.
Here is the rest of O’Brien’s armor. I see she’s wearing the Legendary Wicked Cowl of the Dominatrix — nice. Who did you have to kill to get that one, O’Brien?
In other news . . .
Company this weekend. My MIL, SIL, SIL’s hubs, and their daughter are due to arrive any time now. I’ve been shopping and cleaning all morning.
I really hope I didn’t screw up the dates on this. I’d to do all this cleaning for nuthin.
D.
You know you play too much World of Warcraft when . . .
Your son asks, “Why are you wearing your leopard armor?”
We got some dude off the street to model those undies. Really. Some guy who just happened to be hairy like me. I mean, you don’t really think I’d put my butt up on this blog, do you?
D.
Thirteen favorite photoshoppes
Another lazy-bones thirteen involving (I hope) little or no effort on my part. On the upside: for those of you reading my maiden voyage into the seas of romance, I’ve written about 2000 words since the weekend.
Below the cut: my thirteen best photoshoppes.