Category Archives: Le Photoshoppe


Yes, Virginia, there is a Fitzmas

With apologies to The New York Sun.

Dear Walnut—I am 8 years old.
Some of my wingnut friends say there will be no Fitzmas this year.
Some even say there is no Fitz!
Papa says, ‘If you see it in Balls and Walnuts, it’s so.’
Please tell me the truth, will there be a Fitzmas?

(more…)

Happy Fitzmahannakwanzaakah to You

Hat tip to Dusty.

From Truthout:

Within the last week, Karl Rove told President Bush and Chief of Staff Joshua Bolten, as well as a few other high level administration officials, that he will be indicted in the CIA leak case and will immediately resign his White House job when the special counsel publicly announces the charges against him, according to sources.

My question: what will this do to Bush’s approval ratings? Can’t be good.

Let’s do da Dubya limbo. Say it with me: How low can you go?

Nice tits, Dubya.

D.

Cross-posted at Kos. Go gimme some love!

Britney Spears’s Li’l Road Warrior

Sean Preston Federline-Spears enjoying a morning out with Mom. Like mother, like son?

D.

With apologies to vampire bats

So President Bush is worried about human-animal chimerae:

Tonight I ask you to pass legislation to prohibit the most egregious abuses of medical research, human cloning in all its forms, creating or implanting embryos for experiments, creating human-animal hybrids, and buying, selling, or patenting human embryos. Human life is a gift from our Creator — and that gift should never be discarded, devalued or put up for sale.

Well, Mr. Bush, aside from the fact that such a law would prevent the cloning of human genes into bacterial or viral vectors, thus crippling biomedical research for decades to come, I think you should clean house before implementing such a policy.

You may begin with your Vice President.

D.

When Chihuahuas attack!

First killer bees, now attack chihuahuas hungry for human flesh:

The officer suffered minor injuries including bites to his ankle on Thursday when the five Chihuahuas escaped the 17-year-old boy’s home and rushed the officer in the doorway, said Fremont detective Bill Veteran.

Nor is this an isolated incident. According to this professional consultant who dresses his chihuahuas in camo gear, “Before they’ve had their morning coffee, attack Chihuahuas are not to be trifled with.”

Fortunately, for $44.95, you can warn neighbors and passersby that your attack Chihuahuas are on duty.

So — what do you think — Worst? Photoshopping? Ever?

More later. The Du Bist Deutschland campaign has given me ideas.

D.

Cry Baby Cry

Wi’w Biww O’Weiwwy, he not happy wid dose mean weft wing bwoggas.

On the January 23 O’Reilly Factor, Bill felt it necessary to

attack “far-left websites” for “put[ting] out a fatwa against him” and Washington Post ombudsman Deborah Howell, further claiming the websites engage in “organized terror.” (See Media Matters link, above.)

O’Reilly’s hyperbolic rhetoric takes its place alongside Chris Matthews, Pat Buchanan, Tucker Carlson, and Joe Scarborough, who are trying to equate opposition to Bush with support for bin Laden. O’Reilly, however, adds a distinctly personal spin to the affair. O’Reilly is the target of the fatwa; O’Reilly is the victim of a terrorist campaign.

Hey, Bill? Um, the same Bill who invited Al Qaeda to strike San Francisco? Tell you what. You send me your address, and I’ll send you a box of tissues.

Hat tip to Robot Buddha.

D.

On truthiness, propaganda, and the rise of fascism

Today’s NY Times Op Ed piece by Rich, “Truthiness 101: From Frey to Alito” (reprinted in full by Nevada Thunder) will be his last for a few months:

To my readers: Starting next week, I will be on a book leave, writing nonfiction about our post-9/11 fictions. See you in the spring.

Ah, me. What will I do without my regular infusion of Rich? Maureen Dowd may be the funnier pundit, but Rich is the more accurate marksman of the two.

Today, he draws parallels between faux memoirist James Frey and faux salt-of-the-earth, regular guy Sam Alito. He begins with an allusion to Stephen Colbert’s neologism, truthiness (thank heavens Rich knows the proper attribution for this word!) and moves on into more serious turf:

It’s when truthiness moves beyond the realm of entertainment that it’s a potential peril. As Seth Mnookin, a rehab alumnus, has written in Slate, the macho portrayal of drug abuse in “Pieces” could deter readers battling actual addictions from seeking help. Ms. Winfrey’s blithe re-endorsement of the book is less laughable once you start to imagine some Holocaust denier using her imprimatur to discount Elie Wiesel’s incarceration at Auschwitz in her next book club selection, “Night.”

In reality, some bright lights out there really are suggesting that Wiesel’s dark, haunting Night is a fabrication. Let’s all thank Oprah (never thought I’d write that) for drawing attention to one of the best Holocaust memoirs ever written. But, back to Rich.

What’s remarkable is how much fictionalization plays a role in almost every national debate. Even after a big humbug is exposed as blatantly as Professor Marvel in “The Wizard of Oz” – FEMA’s heck of a job in New Orleans, for instance – we remain ready and eager to be duped by the next tall tale. It’s as if the country is living in a permanent state of suspension of disbelief.

He continues with an analysis of the fictionalization of Sam Alito’s history by Republicans and Democrats alike — even by Alito himself. For the fiction-writers in my crowd, however, Rich’s most resonant message comes early on (emphasis mine):

Democrats who go berserk at their every political defeat still don’t understand this. They fault the public for not listening to their facts and arguments, as though facts and arguments would make a difference, even if the Democrats were coherent. It’s the power of the story that always counts first, and the selling of it that comes second. Accuracy is optional.

Propaganda, that’s what it’s all about. Remember Leni Riefenstahl’s Triumph of the Will? I can imagine Hitler (an unofficial executive producer of the film, according to Wikipedia) briefing Riefenstahl during the film’s creation: “Give ’em a story they can believe in.”

Fascism does not emerge from a vacuum. It thrives on nationalistic sentiment, which in turn depends on powerful and convincing propaganda. Bill O’Reilly, Rush Limbaugh, and George W. Bush wouldn’t exist if there weren’t widespread hunger for their message: that we are Number One, that we stand for freedom worldwide, that we are beset by foes on all sides, that the enemy lives among us. People want to believe.

But the message of Bush, O’Reilly, and Limbaugh is not for all Americans. As the recent ‘War on Christmas’ proves, it’s not Americans who are beset on all sides, but Christian Americans, and, I would argue, White Christian Americans. Those of us who are not Christian, or who are gay, Liberal, or have the wrong pigmentation, are left wondering: Whose country is this?


Hitler manipulated the German nation with the tools of fear and hate for many years before becoming its Führer. He had a simple message for his people: you are great, superior to all others; what keeps you down are those who are different. The Jews. The gays. Socialists, Liberals, Communists. Foes that live among us.

It has become unfashionable to draw parallels between the rise of Nazism and present day America. Some folks think it’s a non-starter, something which silences further debate (see Law, Godwin’s). I think it’s a conversation we must have if we are to avoid any further movement into Nationalist America.

For example, we should consider whether September 11, 2001 was our Reichstag Fire. Let’s ignore the many domestic conspiracy theories, and assume the official version of events is wholly accurate. Nevertheless, 9/11 led to the Patriot Act, our version of the Reichstag Fire Decree.

As a Jewish kid growing up in the 60s and 70s, I lived and breathed the Holocaust. I was taught — no, that’s putting it lightly. I was lectured to, berated, shaken like a rag doll, and made to never forget that we must never forget. Remember Santayana: “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

Can’t happen in America? Remember the Japanese internment camps. Remember Guantanamo.

My wife, Karen, has a chilling angle on all of this: the Nazi analogy is inappropriate because Bush’s America isn’t all that different from business as usual. Compare President John Adams’s Alien and Sedition Acts to President Bush’s recent actions; we haven’t come very far since 1798. Add to that our record vis a vis American Indians, immigrant Asians in the West, slavery, post-Civil War oppression of black Americans, and the abuses under Joseph McCarthy, and Bush & Co. begin to take their appropriate place in American history.

Unfortunately, Americans are poorly educated in American history, never mind world history. It is no accident that our children’s education lags way behind other developed nations.

It makes it that much easier to write propaganda.

D.

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Early for Valentine’s Day, but I’m not complaining

Coming soon from fabu romance publishing company Glassgiant.com:

Gee — thanks, Kate!

It’s only fair to mention that Kate found the site from Merry. By the way, as flattered as I am to have Summer write a whole novel about me, I’m not sure I understand the back cover.

At least I’m still above Creationists.

D.

Will someone please tell me to get a life?

Photoshopping: an insidious addiction. Here’s another one for Blogenfreude:

Dr. Wilhelm O’Goebbels, Chief Propagandist for the Bush Regime

Blogenfreude, if this doesn’t get Bill’s goat, nothing will.

D.
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Senator Joseph McFalafel

This one is for Blogenfreude at Agitprop.

Senator Joseph McFalafel nails the smear merchants.

D.

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