Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
Category Archives: Food
Fritters ‘n turkey salad
So y’all want the sweet potato fritters recipe? It’s not exactly mine to give. Here’s the original, and here’s how I changed it:
I baked my sweet potato at high heat (450F to 500F) until soft, scooped out the flesh, and measured it — just under two cups. I combined it with 1/2 teaspoon salt, 1/2 teaspoon thyme, a few grinds of nutmeg, a few grinds of black pepper, 2 tablespoons of melted butter, 1 tablespoon of sugar, and 1 cup of milk. The milk helped cool the mixture. Next, I added two egg yolks and mixed it well.
Separately, I combined 1/2 cup of flour and 1 teaspoon of baking powder. I whipped my two egg whites to the stiff peak stage, then used the electric mixer to whip up the sweet potato mixture, adding the flour/baking powder dry ingredients gradually to the wet ingredients. Once this was well mixed, I folded in the egg whites.
I fried heaping-teaspoonful-sized dollops of batter in hot canola oil. 365F? Who knows. I don’t have a thermometer that goes up that high. You’ll need to turn the fritters over a few times with a fork in order to brown them evenly.
Drain on paper towels, sprinkle with powdered sugar. I skipped the “serve with syrup” step.
So: the main difference from the linked recipe was my addition of thyme, nutmeg, and black pepper. I was trying for a more savory fritter, but I think I wasn’t bold enough. Karen liked them. I thought they were too bland and, if I do them again, I’ll add a little more salt and perhaps some curry-type seasonings. Everything tastes better with cumin.
Here’s the recipe for Chinese Chicken Salad, more or less unchanged from the version I learned from my sister. Can you use this for turkey leftovers? I don’t see why not. If you like turkey well enough to make it in the first place, you ought to like it in this salad, too. But the best, BEST Chinese Chicken Salad, no arguments please, substitutes roasted duck meat for chicken. Oy. Yum.
Recipe below the cut.
Thanksgiving day postmortem
Three people, two of whom have the appetites of eight-year-olds. Small eight-year-olds.
Three dishes: prime rib, focaccia, and sweet potato fritters.
Three hours of preparation and clean-up.
At least we won’t be eating turkey for the next three weeks.
D.
Thirteen Things I’d Like to Do in the Kitchen with Rachael Ray
Even now, she shines on me from the back of my box of Original Family Size! Wheat Thins, beckoning me with her girl-next-door smile — tomato-red lips, perfect, white teeth — daring me to join her in some Spinach, Garlic, and Vegetable Dip. Dunk your cracker, Walnut. I’ll lick it clean, and then we’ll nibble it together, just like those two mutts in 101 Dalmatians.
Oh, Rachael, how can I resist?
Games to Play
1. Let’s begin with an old favorite — hide the salami — which has certain flavor advantages over Conceal the Carrot or Carry the Cucumber. Rachael, in case you are fastidious about such things, let me reassure you: mine’s kosher.
2. Stuff the Manicotti. I prefer a creamy mixture of ricotta, parmesan, and assorted spices (salt, pepper, and nutmeg at the very least). I hope Rachael won’t mind bringing along an egg or two.
3. Knead the baguette. With proper technique, it can rise to four or five times its initial volume!
Hold that thought.
Cleanup Projects
4. Scrub out the oven. I prefer to do this work by hand; there’s no substitute for elbow grease. And you know, a properly cleaned oven? You should be able to eat off of it.
5. Revamp the freezer. Wonder what we can do with all those old ice cubes?
6. Varnish the back door. Other chefs would ignore your back door, Rachael, but not me. I’ll lavish so much attention on it, you’ll be able to see your face in it afterwards.
Main Courses
7. Snapper. Some guys might like those Cajun “blackened” recipes, but I prefer my fish raw.
8. Taco salad. I prefer the meat warm and tender, the lettuce finely shaved. Drizzle it with a bit of oil and vinegar and you’re ready to go.
9. Rachael needs beef. But what kind of beef? We’ve already hidden the salami; bologna is too darned similar, and besides, it’s a rather flaccid lunchmeat, don’t you think? Hmm. Tube steak? Too crude. Sausage? NO. We’re not making breakfast. Hot dogs? Maybe. But not just any hot dogs. Rachael deserves the best.
Rachel deserves Top Dog.
Palate cleanser
10. Ginger. After stuffing yourself silly (with food, you filthy swine), how do you wake up the palate? How do you make your mouth crackle with excitement and beg for more? Here’s what you do:
Peel a finger of ginger, as long and fat a finger as you can find. That stuff you read about soaking it in cold water? As O’Brien would say, eff that. Cold water is for wussies. Now insert that bad boy into the jaded, much abused orifice, and let it set there a spell, working its magic. About half an hour should suffice. Now let your partner run his tongue inside to get a good belt of spice.
Ginger is so refreshing.
Desserts
11. Whipped cream makes everything taste better. Everything.
12. Banana splits. But I’m out of bananas! What to do, what to do . . .
13. Creme brulee. Sorry, no double entendres; I just love creme brulee. Especially when consumed by the tablespoonful, as body shots off key anatomic areas. Got the picture?
Shaina (o blogless one!) probably regrets knowing me
SxKitten gives us 13 reasons to have sex. Like I needed more than one?
Pat’s 13 Basslines are still up for all to see
Suisan wants someone to hit her over the head. Really!
In a fit of pique (are there any other kinds of piques?) Kate saws off her wedding ring
D.
Crispy rice
Remember: Live Blogging tonight at 7 PM PST!
My sister wants the crispy rice recipe. This one isn’t easy, Sis, but it is tasty.
This is from In a Persian Kitchen — not a bad Persian cookbook, especially for the price, but I’m looking for a better one. Any suggestions?
Chelo (AKA steamed rice . . . AKA crispy rice)
2.5 cups basmati rice
1.5 tbsp salt
2 quarts water
2 tbsp salt
0.5 cup butter (melted)
1. Wash the rice three times in lukewarm water, then soak in salted water (that’s the first 1.5 tbsp of salt) for at least 2 hours, or overnight.
2. Combine 2 quarts of water and 2 tbsp salt. Boil.
3. Drain rice and add it to the boiling water. Boil for 10-15 min, stirring occasionally.
4. Strain the rice and rinse with lukewarm water.
5. Put 1/3 of the melted butter into the bottom of a nonstick pan. I used a deep saute pan, for which I had a lid. (That’s important, as you’ll soon see.) Add 2 tbsp water to the butter.
6. Pile the rice on top of the butter. Distribute the rest of the butter over the rice.
7. If you have saffron, sprinkle a bit over the top of the rice.
8. Cover the saute pan or pot. Cook 10-15 min on medium heat, then 35-40 min on low heat.
9. When you have about 10 min of cooking time left, remove the lid and check the bottom. You should have a golden crust on the bottom. If you don’t, increase the heat and finish cooking it.
Getting that golden crust is key. It’s the reason you’re going to all this bother. Also, if you’re going to make this recipe, you had better make a main course with lots of tasty gravy — otherwise, once again, what’s the point of having crispy rice?
I suspect the leftover rice would make great stir-fried rice, although the butter taste might be a bit unusual for a Chinese dish.
D.
Busy boy
I got home from the grocery store at 3 PM. It’s 8 PM right now, and we’re just finishing dinner. Do the math.
I go nuts sometimes. I’m not sure why. But the List of Accomplishments runs as follows:
Dinner tonight: I made a pecan-based fesenjan with chicken thighs, a dish with lamb and eggplant, and crispy rice. For dessert: chocolate tiramisu.
I also set up some cucumbers for Erin O’Brien’s Hungarian Cucumber salad, thinly sliced beef for Carne Asada, and more thinly sliced beef for bulgogi. Along with tonight’s leftovers, that should take care of dinner for the next few nights.
Time to finish cleaning up. *Big sigh*
D.
P.S.: Ever wonder what would happen if you searched YouTube for ‘anal’?
Funny stuff . . . I promise.
Mean tagine
Before I give you food, meet the newest member of the Nekkid Blogging Club: ~d.
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Tagine.
Oy.
I can’t emphasize enough the wonderfulness of this recipe. It has everything — it’s delicious, beautiful, texturally interesting, hearty, filling. And nutritious, too. It’s also a robust recipe, meaning you can make substitutions and still have a great result. You like chickpeas in your tagine? Cook ’em separately and throw them in towards the end. Prefer fish to chicken? Simply figure out how long your fish needs to cook and add it in at the appropriate stage.
Dates, prunes, pearl onions, olives . . . the variations are endless. Is this a complicated recipe? The ingredients list is lengthy, but the preparation couldn’t be easier. Try it and you’ll see.
Here we go.
The last dough you’ll ever knead
This dough is amazing.
When I made bagels, I reserved half the dough and kept it in the fridge overnight. The next day, I used half the remaining ball to make a focaccia, and two days later, I divided the remaining quarter in thirds and made pita bread.
The bagels, as you know, rawked. The focaccia compared well with this recipe (that old one is an easier recipe, but bear in mind, THIS recipe makes bagels, pita, and focaccia). And the pita? Well, it worked far better than any previous pita recipe I’ve used. They puffed up! They had pockets!
I suspect you could use this for pizza, too, but since it puffs so well (see: pita), you would need to make lots of fork pock-marks all over the dough. Hmm. What else could it do? Breadsticks, dinner rolls . . . you name it.
Here da dough, cribbed from da best baking book, Baking with Julia:
Chicken Soup for the Stomach
This morning, PBW posts a few new publishing opportunities, including an open-ended solicitation from the Chicken Soup for the Soul Machine.
I confess to suspicion regarding CSS. Perhaps it’s my cynicism — I assume most of the stories CSS publishes are fictional. Perhaps it’s my reluctance to believe anything good can come from reading inspirational stories. You’re either a good person or you ain’t, and reading a few weepy-smileys isn’t going to turn a whole life around.
Or, maybe it’s because the CSS people have now become the newest Amway. Such blatant greed runs counter to their ostensible role as soul-nurturers.
Okay. That’s enough meanspiritedness. You want chicken soup? I’ve got the soup.
Boy mit bagels
I made that!
Guess that goes for the boy and the bagels, although I had a bit of help making the boy.
Last time I tried to make bagels, I was in college, and they came out like rubber toss-rings. The experience so traumatized me, I have waited until now to try it again. These came out perfect — go figure. I attribute my success to (A) a kickass power mixer, and (B) a much better oven.
Best thing about this recipe? I have another big ball of dough in the fridge, which I can use to make focaccia tonight, or perhaps another half dozen bagels tomorrow.
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Our high speed modem is futzing. If it doesn’t rally by this evening, I won’t be live blogging. Check in around 7 to 8 PM PST and see if I’m around.
‘Kay, I’ve made breakfast for the family, ran one load of dishes and one of laundry, cleaned the litterbox, and mopped up the cat’s bathroom (you know the routine — shit on the floors, shit on the walls, and kitty litter everywhere). Time to edit!
D.
Taking one for the team
This is the funniest political protest song I’ve heard in the last godawful six years. Big tip of my hat to Blue Gal. I also understand from Blue Gal’s post today that tomorrow is Blog Katrina Day. Hope I can think of something worthwhile to say.
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Meanwhile, back at Chez Walnut, I made some o’ this today:
CRÈME SAINT-HONORÉ OR CRÈME CHIBOUST
Crème Saint-Honoré is a crème pâtissière lightened with stiffly beaten egg whites or whipped cream. A.k.a. Chiboust cream — crème Chiboust — this mixture can be flavoured with vanilla, chocolate, praline, liqueur, grated orange zest etc.
It’s pretty effing amazing how much of this stuff you end up with if you start with five measly eggs. Five eggs . . . that’s like a two-person omelet, for the love of everything unhealthy. I’m going to use it to make a trifle, along with some pound cake, raspberries, and fruit preserves. Nonalcoholic trifle so the boy will eat it, too.
I also made some yummy chopped chicken liver. Although I mentioned this aaaages ago, I never gave a proper recipe. Anyone interested?
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Decent writing weekend, by the way — about 7000 words thus far. I’d like to get one last 1000-word scene written, but I’m getting a bit pooped.
I’m at 80K words on this NiP and I suspect I need another 10 or 15K words to wrap things up nicely. A little long for a first novel, but I should be able to edit out some of the drier medical passages.
Still not happy with titles. I like Sloppy Firsts, but that’s been done. Technical Virgins hasn’t been nabbed yet for fiction, as best I can tell, but it doesn’t have the same sense of fun as Sloppy Firsts. And it’s important to convey the fun.
Off to check mail . . .
D.