Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
Easter Sunday
. . . and a very happy Easter Sunday, too, to all my non-Jewish, non-heathen friends. I’d say non-Muslim, too, except my only Muslim friend follows me on Facebook but doesn’t read my blog.
On this Easter Sunday, I’d like to offer a toast to all the less successful messiahs, including Simon Bar Kokhba, whose transiently successful revolt led to he formation of a second century Jewish state, which required 12 Roman legions plus auxiliaries to put down;
Spanish Kabbalist Moses Botarel, sorcerer, philosopher, and master of the Jewish art of self-promotion; he
stated that the prophet Elijah had appeared to him and appointed him as Messiah. In this role he addressed a circular letter to all the rabbis, asserting that he was able to solve all perplexities, and asking them to send all doubtful questions to him. In this letter (printed by Dukes in Orient, Lit. 1850, p. 825) Botarel refers to himself as a well-known and prominent rabbi, a saint, and the most pious of the pious.
Simon Magus, a first century proto-Gnostic Christian heretic who might have been able to levitate — at least, that’s what his enemies said about him — and who was played by Jack Palance in The Silver Chalice;
90-year-old Unification Church founder Sun Myung Moon, whose followers invite impressionable undergrads to dinner parties only to meet new and interesting people and learn from them — no, really!
And my personal favorite, Moses of Crete, who in the 5th century convinced other Cretan Jews to attempt a trans-Mediterranean journey to the Promised Land by foot; many of his followers drowned, some were rescued, and Moses himself was never seen nor heard from again.
D.
And what about us heathens? Don’t we get to have a happy Easter?
Of course we do – with all of the chocolate and none of the sermon!
No. You and me and the rest of the heathens get to have a very pleasant Sunday, April 4. Sorry to be pedantic but it’s not my holiday.
Even if I do wuv me some Peeps 😉
Hah! Not in Canada! It’s an official holiday 😛
OK, the holiday’s actually Good Friday, but schools and government offices are closed Easter Monday.
Mon dieu, you’re a shape-shifter!
I’m going to ask a stupid question: Did Moses Botarel invent the word “circular” or was his letter actually shaped like a circle. It just struck me as funny. Many apologies.
ever heard of jerusalem syndrome? it happens all the time, people go to Jerusalem and are so overwhelmed by the history and spirituality that they actually begin to think that they are king david/solomon/jesus/a messiah. it’s a recognized mental condition.
🙂
Lyvvie, I really, really don’t know 😉
Shaina, that’s a new one on me. But just off the top of my head, sounds like typical schizophrenia. How are you doing?