Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
You who are so wise in the ways of home-selling . . .
Keep the advice coming. We’re having a garage sale this weekend.
I’m advertising, and I’ve enlisted the aid of one of my favorite scrub nurses, a Portuguese woman who made over six hundred dollars at her last garage sale. This is a woman who knows how to sell shit. I don’t know what she’s going to ask for her assistance, but whatever she asks, chances are it isn’t enough.
I’ve already decided not to mess with prices. “Make me an offer” will be my motto. I’d like to think people will offer a fair price on things, but I’ve heard too many stories of people wanting stuff for free.
Bake cookies. That’s what one of my friends always tells me. Feed ’em chocolate chip cookies, thereby guilt-tripping them into buying stuff. She likes garage sales because she thinks it’s fun convincing people they NEED this garbage. I think she’s nuts.
I’ve already made $230, though. Tonight, I sold some of our construction detritus — French doors that we’d had to remove since, guess what, French doors leak like sieves when faced with horizontal rain; a storm door, never used; a window box, removed from the “old kitchen”; the ultra-heavy front door which we replaced; and a few other doors besides. Where did all of those doors come from? They looked vaguely familiar, but fuck if I could name their former location.
But we have oh so much more junk to sell. Tons of Jake’s clothing, much of it heartbreakingly new. (And we bought this stuff why?) Snake cages and other aquaria. Ikea furniture, fart and it falls apart. Children’s books and toys. An old gas dryer. A wet-dry shop vac with one of its casters missing. An old Peugeot mountain bike.
Meanwhile . . . time to do more laundry. Good night!
D.
“Ikea” – Swedish for “Wal-Mart.”
One tip for garage sales is to have an idea in mind what everything is worth. By that, I mean the total of everything you have for sale.
Because sometimes you will get people that will come in and offer you $x for everything you’ve got. It’s best to have some idea of what everything you’ve got is worth or what you’re willing to let it all go for, so you can hopefully negotiate a mutually agreeable price.
Also, keep out of sight anything you don’t want to sell. You will have people looking at things, even though to the reasonable person they are clearly not for sale, asking you how much it is ’cause there’s no price tag on it.
It also helps if you can demonstrate that appliances work. A couple years ago, at my grandmother’s house sale, there was a hot buyer for the dryer (or was it the washer), but it wouldn’t power up at all. So, no sale. Turns out the switch on the circuit breaker had flipped off. Check those kinds of things out.
I’d be careful about the ‘no prices’ thing… that way lies madness. Besides, people will be more likely to haggle if they have an actual starting point.
Other than that, I have no advice that you could actually implement in time to make a difference. You probably don’t want to, say, add a water feature to your yard or anything like that, do you? (Our St. Louis house had a ugly little, stupid, teardrop-shaped, in-ground pool that we turned into a water garden. It probably sold the house for us…)
I had a “pre” garage sale once and invited some friends over the night before and gave them wine I didn’t want to move. The drunkards bought all manner of useless things. Of course they were mad at me for years afterwards. ALso, craigslist. That place is great for dumping stuff off. I also have always had quite a bit of ripping off going on at the garage sales. Don’t be surprised. it’s the name of the game. Glad you have someone who has offered to master the ceremonies. What a sweetheart.
Whatever you don’t sell or don’t want, donate to a local 501(c)3 charity. Before you donate, make a detailed list of everything you are donating, for example: 25 child’s T shirts, 4 wooden chairs – good condition, etc. Then, be sure and get a valid receipt from the charity. I give everything to Goodwill Industries here in Nashville. Then, when you file your taxes next year, you can deduct the fair market value (garage sale value) of all these items as a charitable contribution. It is up to you to determine the value of the item, but all the Tax software folks (TaxCut, TurboTax, etc.) have really quick, easy and cheap programs that will figure out the value for you. I use Deduction Pro or something like that because they throw it in for free when I buy the deluxe versions of their full tax preparation software. You would not believe how much your junk will be worth, and the donation/deduction can be significant to your txes since it is non cash, unlike those cash contributions that you make to charity. It’s money you have already spent that can use help offset your taxes. You probably earn too much money to get the full value on your taxes, but just thought I would mention it.
Or you can freecycle the excess stuff, although easier to donate, yeah..
Sell cheaper in bulk. When we sold our records it was $3 a record or $1 for the whole huge damn box.
When we left DC, we had a bunch of cool stuff that wasn’t quite to our taste anymore, so everytime people came over, I asked them if they wanted anything in the pile. It’s been kind of cool over the years to see some of it displayed in places of honor in friend’s homes.
Also we brought lots of stuff to a consignment store, so we got some money for it. And what the store didn’t sell, they eventually donated to a charity and gave us a full receipt, which listed the items and was good for tax deductions.
I hear that there are now places that will take all your stuff and eBAY it for a percentage of the profits.
BTW, have lots of change available! Lots! And keep the cashbox some place secure or on your person.
Good luck!