Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
The bump
Late Tuesday night, we found out that Jake would have a PE test on Friday: he would have to bump pass a volleyball back to his teacher five times at a distance of 12 feet.
This left us with two days to practice.
Not Jake's PE teacher.
We bought a volleyball Wednesday afternoon, went to the park, and started working on it. We had a frisbee, too (Jake’s next activity for PE), so when we tired of volleyball, we tossed the frisbee around.
We tired of it . . . um . . . often.
See, I’ve been neglectful as a dad. I haven’t tossed the ball around with Jake, haven’t taught him how to hit a baseball, throw or catch a football, shoot a hoop. I haven’t taught him these things because I’m not a big fan of the Those who can’t do, teach school of thought. The kid can write like a dream (when he isn’t blocked) and tell a joke, though. I taught him those things.
So here we are in the park, me tossing or pitching or whatever the hell it’s called, him trying to bump pass the ball back to me. The ball hurt his forearms, so we could only do it a few times before taking a frisbee break. Which went quite a bit more smoothly than bump passing, I’ll have you know.
After two hours of pure frustration, we went home and did the only reasonable thing. We searched YouTube for videos on how to bump pass. Armed with knowledge, we went back to it. Another fail.
I told Karen it was hopeless; I couldn’t teach him what I didn’t know. And then something unexpected happen.
Turns out Karen played volleyball in junior high, and she still remembered how to bump pass. The move neither Jake nor I could do to save our lives, she could do with every toss (provided I didn’t throw it at her feet or head, which happened about half the time). With Karen advising, Jake started hitting the ball correctly. It still hurt his forearms, and we weren’t able to scale from three-feet-away to twelve-feet-away, but still. After three hours of practice, this was beginning to feel doable.
On Thursday, Karen (confident that technology can solve anything) bought Jake some safety goggles and these forearm protector thingies that archers use. When I came home, we went into the backyard, measured out twelve feet, and decked our son in volleyball-appropriate body armor. More practicing.
It had rained that day and it was a humid evening. All that bending and stooping and running after the ball started getting to me. One hour into the practice, I took a giant step backwards into our pool, neatly killing both of my pagers* and my cell phone.
Changed clothing. Practiced another hour. Jake could execute a few good passes, but we were still limited by my abysmal pitching ability. Our only hope was that he’d have an easier time with a better pitcher.
“Well, if the PE teacher isn’t better than you,” Jake said, “that would be pretty damned pathetic.” Only he didn’t say damned. (I taught him how to swear, too.) When I pretended to be miffed, he added, “He DOES do this for a living, after all.”
We even practiced a little Friday morning — only a few minutes, since Jake had to get to school and I had to go to work. And our practice session was far from encouraging.
How did he do? He made three out of five passes!
You’d think he’d be delighted with three out of five, but Karen says he was disappointed. “It’s still only 60%,” he told her. “That’s a C.”
So he’s anal about grades. Yet another thing I taught him.
Next up: frisbee . . . and then badminton.
D.
*Don’t ask.
Does it matter if he gets a C in sports? Does it have some bearing on overall performance or something? If not, can they not just accept that some people are good and some stuff but not all and award him the grades for effort?
Good luck to the boy…
keith
PS, can I go on your blogroll, Doug? 🙂
http://www.stevenpirie@blogspot.com
Keith! You have a blog! first thing, man.
The PE teacher quashed our “A for effort” theory with the argument, would you give a C student in Algebra an A just because he was trying really hard?
I’ll let you decided the merits of that argument.
If they calculate grade point average including PE, then yes, it matters a great deal. I would like to think college admissions boards would look at the transcripts in detail, but I think they use the GPA raw number as a metric in deciding if they’ll even look at the transcript in the first place.
I think that’s tough. Assuming things are the same as when I was at school, PE didn’t have the same level of streaming as the academic classes, whereby the A students were generally in the ‘top’ class and ‘C’ students ‘lower’. That way the teaching was more targetted. In PE, we were all lumped together regardless of ability and all expected to perform to some arbitrary level. It sounds the same for your son.
Last time I checked, I thought P.E. doesn’t count in the GPA, AND don’t colleges look at just the last three years of high school when it comes to GPA?
How about a local neighborhood boy who can tutor in P.E.?[:
Go, Karen, go! I remember us having some of the same angst about our PE classes back in high school.
And why isn’t Jake’s PE teacher teaching him how to do this move?
Have to say I was in a meeting where the head of an organizational unit with over 300 people working under her said that she rated people outstanding when they tried really hard. She’s also been known to promote people when “it’s their turn”, “they’ve had a hard time and need a break”, etc. It explains some of the outcomes she gets from her staff (I can’t say team). So, I guess I agree that grades should reflect the result.
My older son goes to a psychomotricien (no one can tell me what it’s called in English), who essentially teaches him how to do stuff like throw balls. Apparently he’s improved a lot and one of his PE teachers made a point to tell me he’s doing better.
Great post – especially funny about the beepers and cell phones. Don’t worry too much. PE grades won’t keep a kid out of college. Most colleges use the SAT or ACT scores as a metric rather than GPA. The rigor of curricula is highly variable such that a 4.0 GPA from a public high shool in rural South Carolina may not be equal to a 3.0 GPA from a private high school in Bakersfield, CA. The SAT/ACT scores level the field. The best schools get the best applicants. Grades are important but colleges scrutinize what the kid has done outside of school when it comes down to making final decisions.
I hated volleyball in PE – I always wound up with bruises all over my arms – which is why I was flabbergasted when HA2.0 announced she was joining the school volleyball team. She plays 6 hours a week – it’s a pity we don’t live closer, as I’m sure she’d be happy to tutor Jake.