Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
What to watch on All Hallow’s Eve
I doubt you’ll be surprised to learn that Halloween is our favorite holiday. When Jacob (now ten years old) announced he didn’t want to go candy-raiding this year, it saddened me. I didn’t ask him why, mostly because I dreaded the “I’m too old for that now” response. It might have more to do with his lack of a costume, but that pushes the issue back one step. Why didn’t he pester me about the costume months in advance, as he’s done for the last seven years?
He hasn’t even asked to carve a pumpkin. Damn it, I’m going to get choked up if I keep thinking about this.
On the other hand, I’m also relieved. Thanks to the move, I’m sore as hell, and there are a lot of other things I should be doing besides crafting a cool costume, buying a pumpkin, or blogging. Nevertheless, I’d like to do something special.
I think we should rent a movie.
Here’s my short list of films to watch for Halloween. I dislike slasher flicks, so you won’t find any of the usual recommendations here.
3. Reanimator (1985) Even stuffy Pauline Kael, a critic who never liked a single Kubrick film, loved Reanimator. Based loosely on H. P. Lovecraft’s Herbert West, Reanimator, this film sets the bar for all humor-horror films. Jeffrey Combs gives his best over-the-top performance as West, David Gale (who’s a dead ringer for Senator John Kerry — watch it and tell me I’m wrong) as the evil Dr. Hill, and Barbara Crampton as the Dean’s daughter and winner of my Best Movie Breasts Ever award. Reanimator gives new meaning to the phrase giving head. Who says you need a penis to satisfy a woman?
2. Dead Alive (AKA Braindead, 1992) Ever wonder what Peter Jackson was up to before he got all cozy with hobbits and elves and such? Rent Dead Alive, the funniest zombie flick ever filmed. Engaging young Timothy Balme plays a young man with amorous intentions towards the beautiful Paquita (Diana Penalver). But will his domineering mother (Elizabeth Moody) let him out from under her thumb? Featuring the dreaded Sumatran rat monkey (one bite and you’ll be feasting on brains), interesting new uses for your lawnmower, and the largest vagina dentata ever committed to film. If Karen were writing today’s blog, this would be number one. Come to think of it, it should be number one, but I’m too lazy to change things now.
1. Parents (1989) In what might be described as the dark side of Leave it to Beaver, Randy Quaid and Mary Beth Hurt star as the eponymous mom and dad of darling moppet Bryan Madorsky. Madorsky plays Michael Laemle, a child who develops increasingly paranoid fantasies about his folks. Are his parents extraterrestrials? What are those leftovers made of?
The film was billed as an SF comedy, but horror seems a more apt genre for this nugget. By the way, Karen does not endorse this recommendation. She warns that it’s depressing and disturbing.
Happy Halloween!
D.
Technorati tag: Halloween
All good movies (grin). I haven’t blogged in so long I’ve almost forgotten how, and I don’t know how to include my favorites on my side panel, so I had to hunt for yours, but as always…well worth it.
If you wish a movie for just you and the Mrs later, try “Dead Again” or “Shattered”. Of course, Jack is back on A&E with Stephen King’s “The Shining”, too. No matter what, Happy Halloween. Hugs on the kids growing up – been there. But if you’d like a short video to watch on the computer with The Kid, give me a shout and I’ll send you the file (a clipping from “Scare Tactics”). You have my email addy, I think.
As always, an informative and enjoyable blog. See you around the net.
Long time no see! Thanks for stopping by. If you ever need to find me, Kate Rothwell and the Smart Bitches have me on their sidebars.
Thanks for the tips, Lyn. Happy Halloween!
In response to your post on my blog, I shall make you a sex god, a testosterone Titan, and your wife the vixen who tames you. Just don’t forget the little people when you are hounded for autographs and movie deals. George Clooney wants me badly – he just doesn’t realize it yet.
Hah! You’ll have to fight Miss Snark for George.
I’m planning to run The Nightmare Before Christmas through the ol’ VCR, even if it’s just for the soundtrack.