Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
eCrud
In a recent South Park episode, the Internet crashes, and South Park’s residents (and all America) are left Netless. I’m not that hard up right now, but it’s close. I’m blogging on my Blackberry.
I hate blogging on my Blackberry.
Something about typing with my thumbs, I suppose. It makes me want to use a fork to eat mu shu pork, a hammer to open a quart of milk, a bobby pin to clean ear wax. Thumbs weren’t meant to do anything but hit the space bar.
There’s a rollup keyboard you can buy as an accessory for the Blackberry. It works well. I lost it first time I brought it along on vacation.
What’s wrong with my modem router thingy? Unlike the dolts in South Park, I’ve already checked to see if it’s plugged in (yes). I’ve unplugged and replugged it several times — the ultimate reboot. Figuring it needed a cooldown, I’ve left it unplugged for well over an hour, sitting in front of a fan the whole time. I’d fix it a dry martini if I thought it would help.
The most annoying thing? I can’t check my email. You’re supposed to be able to set up the Blackberry to check email, but it only wants to check its own email. And you know what else? Sometimes it doesn’t ring when it’s supposed to. Today, one of my old attendings called me back. I figured this out when my pocket started talking to me.
I want wetware. That’s right — I want it all in my head.
Gadgets are far too error-prone.
D.
Welp, there’s yer problem… /mythbusters
You’re supposed to make yourself the dry martini…
We had a router that went west. It stopped handing out IPs. Well, it handed them out, but they were on nonexistant networks.
It might not be your router. It could be something beyond there, your cable modem or your ISPs DNS. I’d give your ISP a shout, they can usually narrow down the problem for you.
it could be a lot of things, actually.
1. merely unplugging and re-plugging one’s router and modem don’t constitute a reboot. that’s what’s known as *power cycling*. oftentimes, there’s a small (VERY small) button on the bottom of one’s modem. you’ll need something like a ball-point pen to push it in, it’s so small. try that.
2. it could also be that your router’s and/or modem’s firmware needs an update. you could also try that. if you have a laptop, try plugging directly into the line that goes from the phone line (if it’s dsl) into the modem into the laptop and try accessing the internet that way. if you don’t have a laptop, do the same thing with your desktop. if you still can’t connect, it’s your internet connection and not the other hardware. if you CAN connect, then visit the mfg’s websites and check for updates.
i suggest this shit because we (my brother and i) recently had these problems here at la casita, and we foolishly called
S(ome)B(ullshit)C(ompany) for assistance. what we should have done is call my husband, because that’s what ended up getting the problems solved. if my two suggestions don’t help, then and only then should you call your provider.
good luck!
Joolz: that little button will RESET the router back to factory default. It will wipe out any configuration that the ISP may have required, like DNS servers, gateways, etc. The only time you should press that button is if your router is irretrievably messed up and you have all of the original setup information to hand, because once you press that little button, you’re going to have to set the router up again from scratch. And it will reset the password back to the factory default password, as well.
It is not a reboot. Powering the router off and on will reboot it.
Point 2 is good, though: assuming that both you and your ISP are using DHCP, plugging directly into the modem from the NIC on a machine will give you a good indication of whether the problem is the router or not.
Karen fixed it. Like usual.
As far as I could tell, the cure involved (A) sniping at me about running over the cords with the chair, (B) untangling, unplugging, and replugging said cords, (C) sniping at me because I kept “almost” putting my hand into the ferret poop stain on the floor, and (D) incantations in a language composed exclusively of four-letter words.
Whatever. It worked! Thanks, Karen 🙂
All inanimate objects are intrinsically malevolent.
For “inanimate objects are”, posit “technology is”, and that is what my ex believes. For indeed, it seemed that in her hands, computers and all manner of tech would throw up (their?) collective hands and refuse to co-operate; much cursing resultant.
Yet, WTF? I would try the offending task – and lo and behold, the recalcitrant machines would start, the programs would not abend, and the right ink dots would magically appear on the paper.
At one time (early 90’s) she contemplated starting a consulting business “People without Computers” to help beleaguered folks get along without technology. Somehow I think that bird has flown. It can’t be done any more.
*Oops – tech speak explanation: To “Abend” means that a program ends abnormally (crash). It’s an IBM thing. Like “Dataset” for file, and “AMD” for Fan. (stands for Air Movement Device, of course!).
I don’t know. Just think of all the spam feeding directly into your head.
Edwin
Edwin: it would route directly to my
colonspam trap.Ack! The Blackberry! My office got me one and gave the new number out to all and sundry. The problem? The phone only rang twice. I had it set on the old-fashioned phone ring that everyone of my age and above seems to use for a ring tone (by gum – that’s what a phone really sounds like! I’ll pick that!). Since I’m a girl, my work clothes don’t have pockets, so it lives deep in my purse (which isn’t that deep, but is made of thick, sound muffling leather). By the time the two rings caught my attention, if they did at all, and I started pawing through the purse to find the d–n thing among the digital camera, private celphone, wallet, etc., it had stopped ringing. No biggie, you think. Just call the person back. Well, when people call me from inside work, the Blackberry smuggly reports “Private Number” (why isn’t this the case on my private phone?), so I can’t call back. So, I tell everyone to call me on my private celphone.
Anyway, my husband recently fixed the thing, although it involved taking out the SIM card and putting it in his phone, so he could unblock the time limit on the number of rings before it goes to voicemail.
I did manage to figure out how to lock the thing on my own, so I would stop calling important officials at odd times like 1:40 a.m…
The IT-handy spouse is a key part of any successful 21st century marriage!