Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
Oh, that’s just not right.
Gorillas caught doin’ it in the missionary position.
In the first photograph taken of wild gorillas engaging in the behavior, lowland gorillas in Congo nicknamed George and Leah mate face-to-face as Leah’s four-year-old daughter Nancy looks on.
What’s next — pole-dancing orangutans?
D.
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Awww, I think it’s sweet.
Sweet . . . and spicy, too!
Peeps!
Next, someone will be calling gorilla protective services because they were screwing in front of their kid.
While her daughter looks on! Don’t tell the Religious Right, they’ll have gorillas banned for being too kinky.
And the daughter is only four! Somebody should go to jail over this.
ps: yup, I saw those.
CD: so THAT’S what that GPS is I keep hearing about.
Dean: Gorilla jail. Definitely. Three strikes you’re ape.
Is it wrong that I’m imagining 4 year-old Nancy asking her mom what dad’s doing to her and mom responding she’ll explain it all to Nancy later if she’ll JUST GO AWAY?
Ahem.
Not that there have been any toddler-opening-a-door-at-the-wrong-moment type incidents at *my* house.
::Whistles innocently::
Explanations? Hmm. Let me think.
“Mommy/Daddy said a naughty word.” (Spanking.)
“Daddy’s giving Mommy a massage.” (Doggy style.)
“You know how you sometimes miss a spot on your cheek, and Mommy has to spit on a Kleenex and wipe it off? Well, um, Daddy missed a spot on his penis, and we didn’t have any Kleenex handy.” (Oral sex.)
Feel free to chip in!
“Umm… we’re looking for quarters under the cushions.”
“Daddy is demonstrating a wrestling hold. See how Mommy is pinned?”
Oral sex? Sorry, there are no good explanations for that. Either form. Your kid catches you doing that, you’re screwed. (haha)