Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
And after the spanking, the oral sex
But first, I have to distract my son. Look, Jake!
An interview with the creators of HomeStarRunner.
HomeStarRunner live at the Cork Opera House.
A special tribute to HomeStarRunner.
World of Warcraft meets The Simpsons.
World of Warcraft level 70 warlock action — with Nine Inch Nails background music.
World of Warcraft music video for Nine Inch Nails “Hurt”.
That’ll keep you busy. Nothing below the fold. Nothing at all.
Darla’s Anniversary TT led me to question an assumption which was, for me, so deeply held that I had never thought to question it:
In a committed relationship, oral sex precedes intercourse.
Perhaps I learned this from Monty Python and the Holy Grail:
DINGO: Oh, wicked, bad, naughty, evil Zoot! Oh, she is a naughty person, and she must pay the penalty -- and here in Castle Anthrax, we have but one punishment for setting alight the grail-shaped beacon. You must tie her down on a bed and spank her! GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking! DINGO: You must spank her well. And after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like. And then, spank me. VARIOUS GIRLS: And spank me. And me. And me. DINGO: Yes, yes, you must give us all a good spanking! GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking! DINGO: And after the spanking, the oral sex. GIRLS: Oral sex! Oral sex! GALAHAD: Well, I could stay a BIT longer.
Or perhaps it was the simple necessity of avoiding pregnancy back when contraception wasn’t all that readily available. In the 70s, condoms weren’t dangling from the pharmacy shelves the way they do today. Not only that, but I had some odd notions about intercourse and virginity. I wanted everything to be PERFECT. Wasn’t gonna happen in the back of a car (even if it was a ’66 Mustang). No way. Uh-uh.
If you think about it, though, shouldn’t intercourse precede oral sex? Intercourse can be a very superficial act. You needn’t take off all your clothes, you needn’t even face your partner. With oral sex, however, your partner is quite literally in your face.
In a young relationship (and now I’m making sweeping statements based on my N of 2), establishing intimacy is one of the great challenges. We make ourselves vulnerable through physical contact as well as emotional contact. As sex moves from dry peck-on-the-cheek to a full-throated appreciation of one’s partner, the risk of injury (physical and emotional) escalates, too.
Maybe I’m right about the importance of pregnancy. Sure, intercourse can be distant, detached, little more than a handshake; but even with contraception, there’s a risk that you’ll create an embryo. No matter what your beliefs are with regard to abortion, something like that means (or should mean) that the lovers are thoroughly bound to one another, at least for the short term.
What kind of sex do you consider the most intimate? That question is open to my gay readers, too, of course — and since pregnancy would no longer be an issue, I’m guessing the answers might be very different than for my heterosexual readers.
My answer: 69. Yes, intercourse with a frontal position lends itself to greater intimacy (eye contact, kissing). I can understand that. But I still vote for 69.
After the spanking.
D.
What kind of sex is most intimate? The kind in which you face your vulnerabilities, and come out not only having a rip-roaring orgasm (or several), but come out feeling safe and loved.
How you get there is up to you.
The kind where one partner has an orgasm because his or her partner is having one.
Sometimes I wonder why I bother writing about sex; folks like you two have thought it through far better than I ever could. Here I am obsessed with mechanics, and you’re both light years ahead of me.
The kind where all you wanna do is give, because their satisfaction is your goal, not your own. And they’re doing the exact same thing.
Why can’t someone as shallow as me answer this question?
Thanks, Tam 😉
I’ll give you a shallow answer 🙂 I agree about oral sex being more intimate than intercourse although I typically consider it foreplay. I disagree about the 69 though. I prefer to take turns. Yes, 69 is very intimate and fun sometimes, I am all for a little variety, but for me it is more intimate to really focus on what I am doing and forget my own orgasm for awhile. Then when it is my turn to recieve, I can focus on what is being done for me and how it makes me feel both physically and emotionally.
I do have a deeper answer, but it is pretty much the same thing Tambo said, so I won’t repeat it.
I think most intimate is where one partner is completely naked and the other is fully dressed. I don’t know why, but it’s a mixture of vulnerability and promise.
I don’t like 69. I figure you should not be splitting your attentions, and although I’m a wiz at multi-tasking, where sex in concerned it’s either all about me, or all about him. Well, except for the obvious full sex bit, but even then – it’s all about me and he better just keep up or wait his turn in next round.
Good point, KariBelle. I think I might need to change my answer.
Lyvvie, you demanding little vixen you 🙂