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Flickr Follies for the evening, and a review

Sunday caught me between two hefty posts — Saturday’s story, and tomorrow’s interview with Jackie Kessler. Since I’m too anal retentive to let a day go by without a post, here’s a Flickr image for your contemplation. From Ga Music Maker’s photo stream:

But if you simply MUST read some stuff by yours truly, here’s my review of Interzone #208. That’s what I’ve been working on for the last two weekends. Enjoy.

D.

A not-so-shaggy dog story

In 1995, three days before I would graduate from residency, I received a letter from my departmental chairman informing me that the Department wasn’t entirely sure they would have the funds to keep me on as faculty. My chairman had counted on me getting the bulk of my salary from an NIH grant, a grant I never received. Yes, they had a Full Time Employment position rarin’ to go, but they were saving it for my classmate who would be off next year doing an oncology fellowship in New York. Yes, they really, really wanted me to stay on as faculty, but not enough to screw things up for my classmate.

Karen was five months pregnant with Jake and I was not amused. I did two things. I lost five pounds in three days and I began checking the classifieds in our professional journals.

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‘Twas a dark and stormy night.

The 2006 Bulwer-Lytton Contest winners have been announced. Here’s the runner-up for the Romance category:

Sex with Rachel after she turned fifty was like driving the last-place team on the last day of the Iditarod Dog Sled Race, the point no longer the ride but the finish, the difficulty not the speed but keeping all the parts moving in the right direction, not to mention all that irritating barking.

Dan Winters
Los Altos Hills, CA

You want to read the first place winner? You’ll just have to go see for yourself!

Hat tip to Bill in Portland Maine, at Daily Kos.

D.

The Starr Tukhas Challenge!

If you want to see Kris

look like this

then you need to enter Dean Cochrane’s Nearly Naked Challenge. All it takes is some of your cold, hard cash, people, and Kris will strut her bikini-clad stuff!

(Kris, how much extra for the purple dye job?)

D.

PS: Blogflux Pinger won’t ping for me anymore! I think it has something to do with my sexual content. Anyone know another pinging service I can use — one that is, perhaps, less discriminating?

Thirteen scenes from Gross Anatomy

Nothing says “medical school” like Gross Anatomy. Think about it: anyone can study microbiology, histology, or pathology. But how many people get to cut up dead bodies? How many people would want to?

Maybe in the future, cadaver dissection will be replaced by in computero practical exercises, but I doubt it. A big part of training is learning to violate taboos — getting close to people, asking them the most intimate of questions, touching them in ways even their spouses wouldn’t touch them, and hurting them. None of this comes naturally; all of it must be learned. Or, rather, unlearned. It’s all about breaking down internal barriers.

And that’s why Gross Anatomy will always play a role in medical education.

Follow me below the fold for thirteen memories. Sorry, no more pictures on this one; I doubt I would find anything palatable for mass consumption.

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Why I do it

Because it feels good?

No. Too simple, and if I stopped there I would have this big fat black-and-white photo and several column inches of open space (what is that called, anyway? A gravestone?)

The generic question is, Why do we blog? Today, Blue Gal wades into a mud pit created by Chris Bowers’ recent comments that the days of the solo pundit blogger are over. (Nyah! Take that, Glenn Greenwald!) BG skewers Bowers’ puffery with typical panache:

“There are artists, there are artists who somehow make a living doing their art (sorry, I can’t imagine John Amato writing that “Chris Bowers knows blog success!” business model bullshit), and there are sell-out wankers who want to color themselves important by channeling some Tony Robbins success seminar. I’m too busy doing my thang, and enjoying the writing and work of some very gifted individual bloggers, to worry about which category the big boys fall into.”

I’m not a big boy. I’ll never be a big boy. Whenever my hit counter makes me a wee bit feverish, I check my referrals to remind myself that 95% of my hits comes from guys searching for a semi-nude Christina Aguilera, cameltoes, or butt cracks. But as I hope you all know, I’m not blogging for those folks.

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Lisa Nowak: a medical hypothesis

The television talking heads are trying their best to figure out Lisa Nowak, the diaper-wearing stalker/astronaut, but to my knowledge, no one has suggested the possibility of a medical explanation for her breakdown. The possibilities are endless — tumor, heavy metal intoxication, adverse drug reaction. Lots of things can tweak the mind. But here’s one idea.

This is the “butterfly rash” of systemic lupus erythematosus:

Older photos of Ms. Nowak show no rash:

But recent images of Ms. Nowak, particularly her mug shot, suggest a classic malar “butterfly rash”. Here’s another suggestive photo:

If Ms. Nowak has lupus, it raises the possibility of lupus cerebritis. Among the potential neuropsychiatric manifestations:

Mood disorders such as anxiety and depression are frequently reported.

Cognitive disorders may be variably apparent in patients with SLE. Formal neuropsychiatric testing reveals deficits in 21-67% of patients with SLE. Whether this represents true encephalopathy, neurological damage, medication effects, depression, or some other process is unclear.

Psychosis related to SLE may manifest as paranoia or hallucinations.

All I’m saying is there may be more to this story than a love triangle gone bad. When family, friends, and coworkers react the same way, remarking how vastly out of character her recent behavior has been, you have to entertain the medical hypothesis. News organizations are talking to PSYCHOLOGISTS, for heaven’s sake — no MDs.

Stay tuned.

D.

PS: In other news, The Aristocrats has the inside scoop on how the medical community healed Ted Haggard of his gayness.

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Tukhes lecher

As promised yesterday, ten Yiddish curses (from the Yiddish Radio Project):

1. Khasene hobn zol er mit di malekh hamoves tokhter.
He should marry the daughter of the Angel of Death.

And this is bad why?

2. Oyf doktoyrim zol er dos avekgebn.
He should give it all away to doctors.

Indeed. We doctors deserve it.

Keep reading . . .

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Move over, Satan!

In a recent AP-AOL poll asking Americans — AMERICANS — to rate our country’s top villains, Dubya whupped all competitors, including Bin Laden, Kim Jong Il, and Satan. Don’t Floss with Tinsel has the video.

Now, hold on, wait a sec . . . the MoE is plus/minus 3%. That means Bush might have had only 22% of the vote, while Bin Laden, his nearest competitor, might have had 11%.

Nope. It’s still a 2:1 wipeout.

But hot damn. I think Dubya has finally found something he’s really, really good at: villainy.

D.

Douche what?

And now, a public service announcement, because gaaaaah it’s late, I’m tired, and my brain has been topic-free all day.

That’s not entirely true. My brain kept feeding me Thursday Thirteen topics: Thirteen Yiddish insults and curses; Another Cosmo Thirteen (oh, this is going to be a good one); Thirteen Memories from Gross Anatomy. BUT IT AIN’T BLOODY THURSDAY, so thanks but no thanks, brain.

Anyway.

Let’s talk about nasal douching.

This is the product I hype to my patients: the NeilMed Sinus Rinse Kit. It’s simple. Combine the packet with the correct amount of water (distilled or filtered, ideally at body temperature), shove the nozzle up your nose, and squeeze. If it squirts out your mouth or your other nostril, you’re doing it right.

The idea — no, really, do I have to explain the benefits of douching? It’s like brushing your teeth, for the love of snot. Atomized saline may be better than nasal douching, but any wimp can put spray up their nose; it takes a REAL mensch to douche his nose. A mensch like Swami Ji:

This fellow uses a Neti pot to douche his nose. In one hole, out the other. If you click on the picture, you’ll learn that nasal douching is an ancient yogic practice — so it has to be good! From the same people who invented enemas (and if I’m not careful, I’ll spend the rest of the evening reading these enema testimonials).

Nothing wrong with Neti pots, but I prefer the forcefulness I can achieve with the NeilMed squeeze bottle. Booosh. I do it in the shower because it can be damned messy. And I only do it when my nose gives me fits; I’m not a habitual doucher.

Yes, I suppose I could call this nasal lavage or nasal irrigation, but then I wouldn’t be able to enjoy my patients’ baffled, disbelieving expressions.

He didn’t —

Did he just say . . . ?

My nose?

Yes, Miss. Your nose. What did you think I said?

D.

PS:

Did you mean to search for: Lesbian Bars and Walnuts

Don’t ask.

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