I’ve written before about the student’s dream and my bizarre versions of same. Here’s last night’s version, which my subconscious felt compelled to return to, over and over again:
I’m back in residency training and it’s July 1st*. Even though I am a higher level resident, the medical students, interns, and junior residents are off doing orientation bullcrap, which leaves me to round on a new service. Knowing I have four patients on the ward, I allot myself 30 minutes to familiarize myself with their charts and bring myself up to date on how they’ve been doing over the past twelve hours.
That 30 minutes evaporates, and suddenly my attending physician (the boss) is right there at my side, wanting to round. Fortunately, the dream takes a fantastic turn. As we come to each patient’s bedside, I vaporize said patient with my fire breath spell.
“My God,” sez the boss. “Is that how you treat your patients in real life?”
*Why is this important, you ask? You would do better to ask, why should I never never never show up in the emergency room of a teaching hospital on July 1st? Because that’s when all the newbies come on board. Shiver.