When did high school turn so brutal?

And I’m not talking about bullying — Jake’s at a Catholic high school, so there’s none of that. Unless you count what the teachers are doing.

I popped my head in to see how he was doing. I suspect he was sleeping, but he denied it. He has to finish reading a chapter in his American History text, and it looks like he has about 10 more densely worded pages to go. It’s 10:30 and he still has assignments for Biology and Spanish due tomorrow. And he has a four to seven page paper due on Friday for Theology.

Used to be he was chronically sleep deprived because he’d be up all hours surfing the net. Now he’s chronically sleep deprived because he’s inundated with homework. Is this necessary? Really? I think my high school did a great job preparing me for Berkeley, and I know I didn’t work half as hard as Jake is working now. Well, maybe half as hard. I still had time for leisure reading. And for a girlfriend.

It’s the sleep deprivation that bugs me the most, perhaps because it’s something I understand only too well, having had lots of experience with it during training and from time to time thereafter. My episodic bouts of insomnia occur frequently enough that I am always at least a little bit grateful when I have six or seven uninterrupted hours of rest. I think Jake’s youth is getting him through this, but at what cost? At the very least, he hasn’t the time to join me at the gym.

He’s been slow to do his online Driver’s Ed, and now I’m thinking it’s a good thing he doesn’t have his license. I don’t think he’d be safe to drive, not when he’s been up all night working.

D.

60 and counting

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP) – TLC reality show “59 Kids and Counting” may soon need a new name. Arkansas couple Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar appeared with their burgeoning clan on NBC’s “Today” show Tuesday and announced they are expecting their 60th child in April.

Eighty-five-year-old Michelle Duggar said she’s in good physical shape and that she’s not worried, despite complications during her last pregnancy that led to the premature birth of their youngest child two years ago. She says she’s made it through her first trimester safely.

The couple has said they don’t use birth control. Michelle Duggar says she didn’t necessarily expect to get pregnant again and that she and her husband are excited to welcome the new addition to the family.

“If it’s a boy, he’ll be, oh, J-something,” said Jim Bob. “And if it’s a girl, she’ll be, ah, J-something-else.”

The couple confided that in recent years, megadoses of estrogen for Michelle and electrostimulative ejaculation for Jim Bob have been helpful assists to conception.

“My trips to the clinic give me something to look forward to every month,” said Jim Bob.

“With today’s advanced hormonal techniques, the sky’s the limits!” Michelle enthused. “The good Lord willing, I may have another twenty before St. Peter greets me at the Holy Gates!”

D.

Die Sünde

On our honeymoon (Christmas, 1984), we did the European museum thing — the Louvre, the Musée de l’Orangerie, the Uffizi Gallery in Florence, the Salzburg Museum, and the Neue Pinakothek in Munich. What stood out the most from all of those museums was Franz von Stuck’s Die Sünde:

franz_von_stuck_-_die_sunde_1893

If anything brings me back to Munich, it’ll be this painting.

D.

This is gonna be so freakin awesome

What are you waiting for, read the book!

D.

Lest ye think I’ve been writing

Oh, nay.

I’ve been playing Globs, an insanely addictive game in which you merge with colored spheres by flipping to their color. The goal is to clear the board in 25 moves or less, and — here’s the real hook — your score doubles for the moves you have left over under 25. The piddly 2 points per sphere you get as a base score is nothing; it’s the geometrical growth of your score that drives gameplay. The board starts relatively small, but by level six you have 14 by 14 grid. At 14 by 14, you have to either be lucky or put in some brainpower to clear the board in under 25 moves.

The color of MADNESS!

The color of MADNESS!

In my defense, I do come home tired at the end of the day, and it’s tough overcoming the potential energy hill to get into writing mode. It’s much easier to play Globs. Easier to play Globs than to play World of Warcraft. Amazing, eh?

I’ve been trying to crack the top ten on the daily high scores list. To do so, you need a score at least in the quadrillions (which, amazingly, you can reach by level 20 with some skill and luck). And I finally managed to do that just a moment ago, only to discover that the high scores list is disabled. I wonder if that’s enough to kill my addiction?

The game has been permeating my brain. A few days ago I found myself in bed in the middle of the night in a limbo state, half asleep, half awake, and I was flipping my own color to merge with the bed, the floor, the room . . . It might have been interesting to merge with the universe, all very Zen of me, but I was up to merging with the room when I realized what I was doing and kicked myself out of bed and had a good pee. The Buddha peeing beside me was having a good laugh at my expense, so I elbowed him in the ribs and he peed all over his own bare feet. Touché!

D.

Show, don’t tell

It never fails to amaze me how much “show” it takes to convey the information in 100 words of “tell.” I’m guessing the ratio is something like 10:1.

Yup, just checked. I eliminated two paragraphs of “tell” with 2700+ words of show. That’s more than 10:1.

In fairness, I accomplished a hell of a lot more in those 2700+ words than I did with those 200+ words. But I’m still wondering what to do with something like 2000 more words of “tell” — which was a hell of a lot of political exposition. And I know that I just need to man up and cut the stuff. Very little of it is truly essential.

D.

Tossed salad, before salad tossing came to mean something else.

D.

Paranoia

So I’m trying to use Google Earth to check out some of the neighborhoods in the Washington DC area, and guess what? When I zoom in, I don’t see details on the homes or buildings. It’s like I’m looking at some kid’s Lego model of Capitol Hill.

Seriously. At first I thought, “Gee, the houses on this little inlet of Chesapeake Bay look similar. And, wow, they’re all painted white?”

If you have Google Earth, go take a look at Capitol Hill. Named buildings like the Library of Congress have greater detail than other places, but they’re still fakes.

Maybe there is no Capitol Hill. Maybe it’s all one giant sound stage. Maybe after the War of 1812, DC was never rebuilt.

D.

You got that right . . .

Internet research on World War II led me to a list of “best WW II movies of all time,” which I can’t find at the moment, but which contained a lot of obvious choices (Bridge over the River Kwai, for example) and some films I’d never heard of before. Enter Come and See, of which the list-writer raved, so I thought what the hell. And put it on my Netflix queue.

Tried to watch it tonight. It was incomprehensible to me, perhaps because there’s a vocabulary at play that I do not understand. I noted many sequences of screaming, there were people running around, there was our protagonist looking empty and/or horrified, and things kept getting worse and worse.

It was the best movie I’ve ever fast-forwarded through.

That Wikipedia article has a quote from one of the screenwriters:

I understood that this would be a very brutal film and that it was unlikely that people would be able to watch it.

Yup.

I wanted to appreciate this film. I really did. But I couldn’t even manage to watch it beyond the first half.

D.

Bits and pieces

I’m up to 23 tongue depressors. Still can’t open my mouth as wide as Karen (I’m betting she could fit at least 30 to 32 tongue depressors) but 23 is much better than 12, which is where I was stuck about one week ago. I’m thinking that this IMO (intermaxillary opening — doctor jargon that measures how wide you can open) is good enough for the dentist to put on that new crown. Hopefully, the new dental work won’t set me back another 10 tongue depressors.

***

Yesterday, I finished China Mieville’s Embassytown, which was a bit of a disappointment. With Kraken and The City & The City, I’d begun to feel as if Mieville could do no wrong. Perdido Street Station was a mixed success in my opinion, but then, it was one of his earlier works. I was really looking forward to Embassytown, which is Mieville’s stab at science fiction. Except it’s not. Not really. There’s an artificial-ness to the story, the sort of creeping falseness that happens when the idea or argument is central, and the characters and plot are secondary to it. In the case of Embassytown, I get the strong sense that he wants to engage us in an exploration of the fundamentals of semiotics. This sort of thing may be interesting, but it hardly makes for a great story. Let me put it this way . . . I have a linguistics friend from college who would absolutely lurve this book. Everyone else? Well . . .

Avice Benner Cho (and I’m sure the “ABC” of her name is intentional) is a colonist at a distant outpost, one of the fringe settlements of Homo diaspora. She grows up in Embassytown, a human (and other non-native sentient species) ghetto within the City, which is where the Hosts live, also known as the Ariekei. The Ariekei are mostly insect-like beings whose language is devoid of symbolic elements. When they say their word for “aircraft,” for example, their minds equate the word with the aircraft. It’s not so much that the sounds “aircraft” symbolize an actual aircraft; they might as well be that aircraft. The only way they can create similes is by having a concrete representation of the simile in their living experience. Thenceforward, they can refer to the memory of that simile and use it in conversation. In one of the book’s earliest scenes, Avice Benner Cho becomes one of their similes.

To a large degree, the success of such a story depends on whether you can accept that initial set-up: that a sentient being could exist for whom language lacks symbolic value. Red is not just a sound which we associate with a color, it is that color, and so on. Unfortunately, I was never able to make that leap.

There are, nevertheless, some cool aspects to this story. Without giving away too much, I’ll only say that Embassytown has about the most convincing “language as mind-altering substance” thread as any I’ve seen in a science fiction work of any media. Mieville sets up a language-based crisis which is convincing, and things go to hell in an equally convincing manner. Whether you’ll buy Avice Benner Cho’s solution to the crisis is another thing entirely.

You have to give the guy credit, though. He’s tackling some big questions here on the nature of language and how it shapes thought, and so I’m loath to criticize him for not hitting a home run on every point he tries to make. So many books these days are about nothing at all.

Which reminds me . . . did I forget to hype Sara Gran’s Claire DeWitt and the City of the Dead? Pure pleasure.

But now I need something new to read.

***

Gave a talk to the pediatricians today on tonsillitis, tonsillectomy, nasal and ear foreign bodies. I was competing with a talk in the other classroom — that one was on “the motivational interview” (basically, how to convince your patients to do something — quit smoking, exercise, lose weight, manage their diabetes more closely). Most of the docs went to that one, but I got the pediatricians and family practitioners, most of them, maybe 15 or so.

It went over well but I think they mostly wanted to share foreign body stories. Doctors love foreign body stories.

D.