Memed thanks to Kate.
1. You just found out that Babe the Blue Ox should not have balls.
2. You’re beginning to think that “Change We Can Believe In” are the pennies Obama receives when he goes begging for Republican votes.
3. You miss Mars Bars.
Ultimately I took my sister’s advice and bought my mom a Macy’s gift card for her birthday, but not before walking up and down the mall searching for just that right balance of glam, sequins, flowers, and froth. Shopkeepers predatory for commissions kept their eyes on me as I passed, murmuring Let me know if there’s any, Can I help, How are you to, Are you shopping for your, the pulsatile tinnitus of Madison Avenue.
The cosmetics counter women have given up. They give each other makeovers or lurk expressionless by their wares. An older woman in Fashion belts out a song just out of step with the Muzak and wants to know if I like anything I see. “It’s all too stylish,” I say, and move on, quickly. My mother doesn’t do haute couture.
The mall is empty of money. The mall is full of bored kids, dropouts and truants, Generation Huh? Only the food court is busy.
This guy on his cell phone, someone’s arguing with him about training for a marathon. “There’s no way I could train for a marathon in six months,” he says. “Even if I could, I don’t think I have the mental outlook to run.” Guy looks upwards of 400 lbs. His gut squirms out below his tee shirt, gasping for air.
As for me, I’m one of the underemployed. We’re all taking a day off per pay period to meet the budget; our supe knows how to share the pain. Like Castro’s Cuba, Karen tells me. Oh, well. I can absorb a 10% pay cut and still do well. And besides, it gives me time to do the important things, like buy my mom a gift certificate for her birthday.
D.
In the process of answering the question, “How ancient are squid?” Karen and I found the Tree of Life Project. This site aims to provide information (and images) on Every. Life. Form. Even questionable life forms, like viruses, which are truly bizarre things when you get right down to it.
I’m always interested in the weird stuff, so I was happy to see one good article on the Archaea and some good links on Placozoa (the guys who fight with sponges over the title of Most Primitive Animal). And oooooooh aren’t water bears so cuuuuute I jus’ wanna snuggle uppawumpums oh who’s a naughty tardigrade you are!
And now for something completely different: our latest timesink at Chez Walnut, 5 Second Movies by That Guy With The Glasses. Many sparkling nuggets here, but we particularly like The Godfather, Fargo, and Brokeback Mountain. Enjoy.
So . . . where have you been wasting your time lately?
D.