Balls and Walnuts
more than you ever wanted to know
Overheard in the locker room
Call them Dude A and Dude B. I couldn’t see either one (there was a row of lockers between us) so I cannot provide any factual verification.
Dude A: Dude! You’re not going to!
Dude B: Gotta. I forgot to bring another pair of shorts.
Dude A: Dude, those are zipper pants.
Dude B: Yeah, well.
Dude A: I’m just saying. Dude.
Dude B: Dude, you’re like a hundred times bigger than me, so I’m telling you, I don’t have to worry about it.
Dude A: Unless you’ve like shrunk up since high school, you’re big enough to reach your zipper.
Dude B: Not a problem ‘less I get a hard-on.
Dude A: It happens, Dude. Like, spontaneously.
Dude B: No, man, I’m getting too old for that shit. Mine takes some attention.
From there, it devolved into a discussion of what it would take to get a spontaneous erection these days. The word “penis” figured prominently. Dude, I’m not kidding.
D.
It’s conversations like these that make me glad I’m not a guy. Yeah, we have to deal with bras and PMS and stuff, but at least our body parts don’t have (embarrassing) minds of their own!
What Chris said.
What is it with dudes and their penis? Get over yourself.